Sunday, May 8, 2016

The Categories of Motherhood

Mother's Day. A day when we celebrate the women who have sacrificed so much for their little ones. When we praise the ones who care for and deeply loved us when we didn't know how to love and care for ourselves. It's a beautiful day. It's an important day. It's a day that is deserved. But for many women out there... it's a day that hurts.

It's a day that reminds them of the child that was lost. Whether that child took a breath outside of the womb or didn't... it was a life gone too soon. A life that was called home earlier than we could understand. A life that was considered a life from the moment they were conceived. A life that was now made whole and beautiful and complete in the arms of our Savior... in the midst of sadness and weeping and brokenness down here on Earth.

It reminds them of the child they will never have. That for some reason or another their bodies can't make or hold a child. That for some reason, something just wasn't working the way it was suppose to. Some have struggled with it was months or even years. Many sweet women in my life have allowed me to walk through this hard circumstance with them. Interceding on their behalf. Crying out to the Lord in confusion and sometimes anger. Pleading with the Lord to remove that barrier and allow those ladies to become mommies. All of those prayers have been answered... unfortunately, some of the answers have been "no".

It's a day that--even though filled with good things-- can feel like a constant reminder of the desires of their hearts that are not being answered. To the "mommy want to be's" who simply are not in that place of life. The women that have a strong yearning to be a mother. To nurture, care for,  love, give selflessly, and feel their heart outside their chest. It's to the women who try to be joyful in those extreme times of loneliness. Desiring a husband and child and sit and watch all of their friends pass them by. It's the women who have to choke back tears as their friends scream "we're pregnant with our THIRD baby" while they are weeping to the Lord silently "Jesus... Gosh, Lord. I just really want this. Your will be done, however, Lord!" The women who are reminded (probably not intentionally malicious) that their "clocks are ticking away" or asked "do you not WANT a baby?". Questions that sting and can easily cause doubt and lies to creep into their minds. It's a day that seems like another year of disappointment.

However, and more importantly, it's also a day of promises. It's a day that tells us that we are called to love others well. That we are called to care for people in a way that allows them to see a Father. A Good Father. One who provides and loves even when it is hard to see... we are called to radiate that. Whether that is to a child, a student, a teenager, a peer, an orphan, or your own parent.... the Lord has entrusted His sheep to His disciples.

I am not a mother. I get called it about 15 times a day by my students, but I do not have a child of my own. I have never given birth or adopted (yet). But, I have been called to love others. I have been called to encourage others. I have been called to uplift, affirm, come along side of, pick up, and speak truth into others. And I don't know about you other ladies... but that sure sounds like the qualities of a mother to me.

So know I spent some time praying for all the different categories of women: the ones who have lost, the ones who have, the ones who will never have, and the ones who don't have yet. You are important. You are equipped. And you, my sweet, strong, bold women... in these seasons... are loved and worth it.

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